133: Female EHS Leaders: Leveraging Your Superpowers Conversation Continued from NSC 2025

Jill James:

This is the Accidental Safety Pro, brought to you by HSI. This episode is recorded October 13th, 2025. My name is Jill James HSI, chief Safety Officer, and joining me today is my friend Monique Parker. Monique is Chief Sustainability Officer at Elevra Lithium and is on the board of ASSP. Back in September of this year, Monique and I, along with Laynnea Myles, Assistant Vice President of EHS in the cosmetics industry and NSC Chair of the Young Professionals Division, and is also co-host of the podcast, SHE Unfiltered. And my colleague from HSI, Kristi McClure, the four of us collaborated and presented a session at the National Safety Council's Congress and Expo in Denver. We titled our session, female EHS Leaders, leveraging Your Superpowers. The four of us have been regularly presenting at ASSP and NSC conferences over the years and often curate our presentations toward female EHS professionals and our allies. This year was no different. What was different is that our room filled and people couldn't get in the room. And when I say it filled, it really filled. Women were sitting on the floor all the way up to the stage and others stood against the walls. And we heard there were others of you that were waiting outside. If you were one of those people waiting outside and you couldn't get in, we're sorry if you were in the room. Thank you for being there, and if you wish you could have been there. No worries. We are here today. Our intent isn't to go over our entire presentation, rather, I'd like to share or we'd like to share the highlight reel, if you will, and share the success stories we've heard since Denver. Monique is joining from North Carolina today, and welcome back to the show. Thanks, Monique.

Monique Parker:

Thank you. Very excited to be here today.

Jill James:

So at NSC, the four of us talked about three things primarily. How about we share with the audience what those were?

Monique Parker:

So our three main topics at NSC were around communication boundaries and salary negotiation. We felt that those three were areas where many women and even allies, all people professionals struggle at times. And so we wanted to really look at how we can help support in those areas. And again, connecting to superpowers, the various powers that we all instill within ourselves that we sometimes forget about and helping in those areas

Jill James:

And those superpowers that we identified, there's a list of them. I can go over some of those superpowers and maybe as people are listening, you can think about, I think I have that one. So adaptability or flexibility as we called it. Relational or empathy, creativity and innovation. Problem solving, communication, time management, attention to detail, influence or persuasion, hyper-focused execution or the doer having perseverance, self-awareness or reflection, disruption, observant diplomacy and personable. Monique, that was a lot of superpowers that we came up with.

Monique Parker:

There were a lot, but I think we figured out how to get through each one of them in the hour that we had before. So I don't think we'll touch everyone today, but hopefully this will give you an idea of things that you may not think are superpowers that you possess and how you use them on a daily basis.

Jill James:

And we started our conversation off by talking about really why do we want to talk about these things? And you've discussed a little bit of that, Monique, but one of those other reasons that we stated is that when you get to be in a leadership position, particularly as a female, it can feel lonely at the top, as we called it. Yeah. Do you want to say more about that?

Monique Parker:

Most definitely. Many of us aspire to get there, and when we finally get there, we're like, oh, I've made it. And then you find yourself sometimes alienated or not having the sense of accomplishment that you thought you would because you got there. And so that was definitely one. As a woman, sometimes we're the only, sometimes we establish friends along the way, and when you get to the top, those relationships aren't always the same, whether it's because the role won't allow it to be because you have confidentiality that you need to exhibit. And sometimes there's just this uncertainty. Jill, what other points did you express or did you feel getting to the top?

Jill James:

Yeah, I mean, some of it is speaking the language of leadership,

Jill James:

It's a little bit of a foreign territory for some of us, especially if it's first leadership positions and you're like, what? It's not necessarily the EHS language that we're all used to. It's EHS plus leadership language and the language of business. And some of us may not be proficient in that. And so it feels like really a new land that we've landed on, and we might be the alien on the planet at that point. Yeah,

Monique Parker:

Definitely have felt like the alien at times.

Jill James:

Same. And I know that we talked about how sometimes in leadership roles, there's a lot of analogies that are used that often have to do with sports, which is your strength, but not my strength. So when people are using analogies, particularly on company decisions and aligning it with sports things, I'm like, oh my gosh, what does that mean? And Monique, you've got that nailed. So for anyone who has that superpower, we didn't put on the list. Congratulations. Yeah. Yeah. So let's see. Do we want to talk about boundaries or communication? What do you think we want to talk about first? Monique,

Monique Parker:

I think we hit on boundary. I mean, I'm sorry, communications first, just because it leads well into boundaries, because if you can't communicate your boundaries, then guess what? It's hard to express and explain what those are and exhibit 'em,

Jill James:

Right? Right. So with communication, we talked about using superpowers of creativity and influence. At least those are the two superpowers that I use when it comes to communication. And I think that my strength when it comes to communication is my ability to unwind complex things and distill them into simple, understandable things that people can understand. So since my background is in OSHA compliance as a former regulator, I've gotten really good at unwinding what those regulations mean. And I like to tell a story about how once I was trying to convince a leadership team when I was working in the healthcare industry, that we needed to comply with the hazard communication law, and they had never even dealt with compliance in that law before. And these are all non EHS people sitting in a boardroom. And I was trying to figure out how can I get their attention on this? And so I printed the actual law on pieces of paper, and it's a pretty big law, and I taped all the pages together end to end, and I rolled it up like a scroll, and I had a colleague stand on one end of the boardroom table, and I unrolled it like a scroll over the top of the heads of everybody sitting at the table and said, this is a law and we're mandated to comply with it and we're not doing anything with it. And that got everybody's attention in the room. And then I was able to pull out the key elements and explain what that meant and what it meant for not only compliance from a legal perspective, but what we weren't doing for our employees. And that really got people's attention.

Monique Parker:

I would say that would be a lasting impression that I wouldn't forget.

Jill James:

I have someone from the marketing team back at that job was in the room that day, and she still talks about it. And that was like 15 years ago. Julie, remember when you did the thing with the Yeah.

Monique Parker:

Oh yeah. That would be memorable.

Jill James:

Yeah. Yeah. So it's like what can you use your superpower for? What is your superpower in terms of communication styles and knowing that you need to be flexible for your audience as well. When I talk with my CEO, I'm going to get right down to a couple of sentences of the key things that he's interested in. And if you're like, oh gosh, I don't know what my CEO is interested in or whoever it is that you're reporting to, ask them them that question, what keeps you up at night? How can I help you drive the business forward? What are the key things that you're concerned about this quarter, this year? What sort of ways do you use your superpowers with communication, Monique?

Monique Parker:

So the two superpowers that I relate to communication for me are attention to detail and observant.

Monique Parker:

The reason I go lean toward these two is because when I was younger in my career, I was always listening to respond. And so I was never really hearing what people were seeing. And it taught me that I needed to really focus and be observant of what people were saying, how they were saying it, what the emotions they brought with it. And that really changed how I then communicated back because it allowed me to really get into the nuts and bolts of what they were saying. And so those were the two superpowers that I leaned on the most, and it's really helped when it comes to looking at how do I communicate to every room? Because communication is only effective as those that are hearing you. And if I'm not reading the room properly, then guess what? I've completely alienated some or maybe all of the room. And so it's understanding what I need to say, how I need to say it. And also, I'm not one for a lot of words, I was trained to, I'm always in audit mode, is what I tell everybody. So I hear a question and I answer the question without a lot of extra, but at the same time, sometimes a little extra is needed. And so I want to be concise, but at the same time provide all the necessary knowledge that the room desires. And trying to anticipate what that looks like is sometimes a challenge as well, because depending on if the room is of diverse background, whether it's the CEO all the way to a frontline supervisor, some are going to need more than others. So figuring out how to navigate through that is also a big point of communication, is reading the room, understanding the needs of the room, as you've already mentioned, Jill, and making sure that you are providing the information. And I loved your story with the paper and drawing it out because a lot of times if you leave somebody with a story or some memorable moment, it resonates differently than a bunch of blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, that we're saying they can see it, feel it, hear it, and it brings a whole different level of acceptance of what the conversation.

Jill James:

Yeah. And when you talked about paying attention to the people in the room and in the moment, obviously paying attention to people's body language and if they're looking at you, if they're trailing off somewhere, if they're looking closed off or angry or whatever, that's one thing to pay attention to. And if you're new to a leadership team, really taking time if you can to get to know who the people are and what

Jill James:

Them tick ahead of time is going to really make you more effective when it's your turn to speak and when you have the ability to speak. I'm thinking about many years ago in a previous job, I was working in support of an engineering company and one of the head engineers had come to me and said, Hey, our r and d department developed this new piece of equipment and we want to do a JSA. And I've gathered a whole bunch of my engineers together, we're wondering if you can come and can you be part of this as we're walking through this new piece of equipment? And I'm like, wow, totally honored I could do that with them. And I was kind of thinking through my head about how I'd want that to go and what I would do when I would show up knowing that I was part of the team. And I saw him in the cafeteria that same day, and he's like, well, are you ready? And I said, yeah, I think so. I've been thinking about the things that I can contribute and how I want to do this, and I've got some ideas and his face got pale and I'm like, oh, crap, what did I do here? And I happened to be working at that time. That job was, everyone took the strengths finder assessment, and I went back to my office really quick and I looked up his number one strength, which it had all to do with details and checking boxes. And when he heard me go, yeah, I have some rough ideas, he just went, oh crap, why did I invite her so quickly before I went? I created a checklist, I had a flow, I made copies of it, I showed up with those engineers, I handed it out and said, here's what I want to do today. And he was just thrilled. And I would've done exactly the same thing if I would've just shown up without the notes, but that he needed that piece, the literal piece of paper, and wanted to see the context of what I wanted to do, and it made him comfortable and it all went off just fine. So getting to know the people at the leadership team I think is important.

Monique Parker:

I can attest to that being that the company I work for, we just went through a merger and now we're all coming together as a leadership team, as a new board. Understanding those in the room is super critical if you think about it. Not only if you go to a new job, but if you go to a new position when you're leveling up, as I like to call it. And going to that next role is so critical and important to understand the new team that you're with. And sometimes it's the same team that you're with new people, and you need to take that same approach because communication, it can make or break a deal, as many people say in regards to how your full impression or your lasting impression will be in that group.

Jill James:

That's right. That's right. And at the end of the day, if you don't remember anything else, you can always lean into the saying, be bright, be brief, and be gone.

Monique Parker:

The first time you said that, I took notes like Hess, I was like, I like that. I can figure that one out.

Jill James:

Well, it's one that I have to tell myself over and over again because for anyone who's already been listening to me, Yammer, yammer, yammer, I can use way too many words. Whereas Monique is skilled at being bright and brief,

Monique Parker:

Multiple years of practice.

Jill James:

Well, you're good at it. Oh, man. Alright, so boundaries. You want to kick us off with boundaries?

Monique Parker:

Yes. For those that were in the room at NSC, this is one of my favorite ones. Out of everything in my career is one that I am committed to the most. And that's about setting boundaries and that's professional, personal. You need to understand what are your non-negotiables, what are you willing to do? What are you not willing to do? And how does that impact not only your professional life and your career trajectory, but also your personal life and your family engagements, involvement and responsibilities. So my two superpowers for boundaries are adaptability, flexibility, and then I'm going to use one that sometimes when people hear or see they've put immediately and think negative, but my other superpower here is disruption, And I want to talk about that part first because like I said, there's sometimes a negative definition that comes along with that word, but disruption is not always negative. Disruption can be a positive for all in the room if you're not necessarily disrupting it in a bad way, but you're changing the flow, you're changing the perception, you're changing the norm of a group or the room or the leaders because you look at things differently, you see things differently, you bring different value. Those things can also be a disruption, but it can be a very positive. So I just like to give an example of this one, and I share this when we are Denver because for me, it really solidified how non-negotiable my boundaries were. And I was one supported by my employer, but also two, it showed my family how important they were. And when the two are in harmony, it makes life a lot easier for you. But when my son was in high school, he was a high school varsity football player, and I started traveling constantly about 75% of the time. And so at the beginning of the school year when football season was about to start, I sat him down and I was like, what are your expectations of me? Now some people are like, why are you having this conversation with a child? Well, he's my son, he's my child, but he's also a very critical part of who I am as a person. And so his request of me was he wanted me at every football game on Friday night. So I said, okay, I didn't know what that meant and I didn't know if I was going to be able to keep it, but I knew I had then set a boundary for myself of what was a non-negotiable for him. And so therefore, it was a non-negotiable for me, and everything was going fine. I was able to navigate it. And then one set of weeks, there was a trip where I needed to go to China. And it's not like you're going to California, you're going to China. So there's a different level of preparation that has to go into taking that trip. And so we had a game back to back Friday nights, and they wanted me in China for three weeks. And I went to my boss and I said, I have no problems going to China. I said, I have no problems being there three weeks, but I have to be back on this Friday night. I am willing to leave Saturday morning to get over there. I will be there till Friday China time so I can be back just in Pine to make this football game on Friday night, and then I will leave again Saturday morning and go back and finish the rest of this day. And I got no resistance, which I was actually very shocked about, but I got no resistance. But at the end of the day, if I did get resistance, I already knew what my response was going to be is it is a non-negotiable, I can't go now. I know it's work, your livelihood versus your child. But that was a boundary that I was willing to stand very strong on and be committed to, and I was able to do both. I was able to make the game. I landed and had an hour drive, and I went straight to the game and got there a few minutes after the game started, and he saw me in the stands and all was great with the world, but one part I forgot to tell is I did do some crying at the airport because I almost missed my flight and they were not going to let me on the plane, but that doesn't matter. I persevered and I was disruptive and I was able to get on the flight and get to the game. And so that's something that's very important for me is what are those boundaries? And everybody's boundaries are different, and everybody's situations are different. Sometimes I was just with one of my coworkers last week who's like, I'm a workaholic, and that's okay. And there was a time when I was very much a workaholic. Not that I don't work hard now, but I put limits on what that work looks like. And I'm still very, very dependable. I'm reliable, and I'm still very much getting things done an executor. But at the same time, those things are important. And the other part that's extremely critical in that is not only to set your boundaries, but to communicate your boundaries. So we just finished talking about communication. Having boundaries without sharing them is not having boundaries. And so you need to make sure that those around you in all spaces understand what those are in addressing them. When things come up, when things come up and they challenge your boundaries, talk about it, express it. There may be others in the room who may not have the same ability to speak their mind about their boundaries, but you can be their voice for them without even knowing it or understanding it. And then when it comes to leadership role, modeling those boundaries. So if a younger professional sees you setting boundaries and executing against them, it will give them more of a confidence to do the same, to be that bright light that they need to be to show that you can do it all. It's just about how you do it, where you show up, when you show up and what that looks like.

Jill James:

That's right. And I think I, that's so important, particularly for women to hear when we all know we have at least two full-time jobs, And one of them is with our families and being able to do exactly what you said, it's not like it's showing a sign of weakness to say that I have responsibilities outside of this job. I think you said it beautifully. I am a committed employee. I am going to be here. I am going to do my work. And also it might be someone saying something like, I have really significant elder care responsibilities in my off work time. And so that means I'm not going to be able to say yes to X, Y, and Z or working on a Saturday or whatever it is, whatever it is. But like you said, to really say that upfront is so important. And I was thinking about what you said about being a disruptor. I had a coworker several years ago who called himself the conscientious objector in any meeting, and he would designate himself as that role. So if we were doing some creativity work on how could we do this, how could we do that? And he would always be throwing sand in the gears, and I'd be

Jill James:

Seth, the first time he did it, I'm like, Seth, come on. And he's like, no, I'm the conscientious objector. And it just made us think about things differently. He wasn't disagreeing, he was just being the designated objector. And then sometimes we'd get together and he'd say like, listen, I'm not going to be that person today. Somebody else take that. And it was so helpful. It really helped our creativity. It was great.

Monique Parker:

And I love that. Again, I just took a note myself of making sure I can rephrase and use that word. One of the things that I think is important to mention during boundaries, when Lanaya was with us on stage when we were at NSC, one of the things she helped us realize is that a lot of times as women, we talk about our work life, our family life, and there's this conception of, for women, especially depending on where they are in their career, do you have children? Do you not have children? And what that looks like and how some people perceive a person, whether male or female without children, is having a lot more flexibility and adaptability.

Monique Parker:

I think it's important for us to reiterate that all of our personal lives look very, very different. And regardless of what they look like, we should all be respectful of the various boundaries that people set, regardless of if those boundaries look different than what the norm or the expected or the universal guidelines are, if there are such things. So I would be remiss if I didn't mention that, just because I know how in our conversations, Lanaya has always been a bright shining light to help us look at things in a different lens. And I think that's very important.

Jill James:

Agreed. Agreed. As for my superpowers with boundaries for me and with others, and that took me a while to figure out I'm a transparent person, an honest person, and I've already said that I sometimes talk too much. And so early on in my career, I would share more about myself than was necessary. We were talking about being bright and being gone, right? Well, sometimes I felt like, well, I have to explain, I need this time off because of this, or I'm going here, I'm doing this. Or just the things that were unnecessary that you don't have to share with leaders, unless of course you feel safe and have a collegial friendship at work, which that happens. And that's a good thing when it does.

Jill James:

Not everybody has to know everything about you. I had a leader that I reported to a while back who I called the good news boss, only wanted to know the good news. And so I'd figure out like, alright, what am I going to say? That's good. We'd have personal conversations like, Hey, how are you doing? And then I would give the good news version that reel, and of course the good news about work as well, but you don't have to explain all parts of your life to everybody that you work with. And one of the things that we talked about in Denver was setting private appointments on your calendar. For those of us who work in industries where everybody in an entire company has access to your calendar, which is what I have where I work, I don't know about you, Monique, does everyone have access to your calendar to schedule on it? Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, that's pretty common. And so when I have things that I need to block out or that maybe the title of a meeting, I just set it as a private appointment because I know that people can see all of your business, and it's okay To set private appointments on your calendar. And that's an okay thing to do. And this is one of those topics that we get a lot of people talking with us about afterward. Like, I am going to overshare, or really, you put private appointments on your calendar. A lot of people asked us questions about that.

Monique Parker:

Most definitely. Most definitely. And I mean, at the end of the day, there are things that have to happen during considered work hours, and it doesn't mean that you're not doing more work after hours. So I just think it needs to become more of a norm than a dis norm.

Jill James:

And I think with regard to people having access to calendars, if you have a particular meeting scheduled and it's with maybe another leader, or you have a title of it, maybe you want to set that as private because whoever is looking at your calendar might get nervous,

Jill James:

Oh, why are they meeting with this person? Wonder what that meeting is about. And all of a sudden people have stories they've spun up in their head about what something might be about.

Monique Parker:

Exactly.

Jill James:

Yeah. Happens all the time.

Monique Parker:

Indeed.

Jill James:

Oh, alright. Let's talk about the money,

Monique Parker:

Money, money, money. If Lanaya was here, she would sting. So I had to get that out there.

Jill James:

Yeah, good job,

Monique Parker:

Good job,

Jill James:

Good job.

Monique Parker:

She sounds better than me, but we got it. I think. So from a salary stand, one of the things that we really focused on salary here is not just about what's the number, how much money do I make? Because a lot of times that's where we start, but what we want to reiterate through this is your compensation, your full compensation is so, so much bigger than the number of your base salary. And the superpower that I noted for salary is diplomacy. And it really resonated for me from the standpoint of understanding how to make sure all the pieces of the puzzle come to together to get the best outcome for the company because they're going to get your brilliance of the person who's going to do the role, and for yourself to make sure that your situation is taken care of personally due to the compensation that you receive. I think it's very, very important. And I'm going to jump to some of the critical pieces and then we'll come backwards. I think maybe the better way, during the presentation, we had a worksheet that we made available. And for those, if you listen to the podcast and you want to get it, you can reach out to Jill and I on LinkedIn and we can make sure that you get access to this information. But on the,

Jill James:

Oh, go ahead. Sorry. I'll just make a note real quick that Emily, our producer, is creating a special landing page for us for this.

Monique Parker:

Perfect.

Jill James:

And so it'll be in the show notes of the podcast and it'll include the handouts that Monique is talking about as well as our presentation deck and some other resources. So go ahead.

Monique Parker:

Perfect. Perfect. And so in the salary worksheet, this is something that I created when I was very, very young because I'm all about numbers and I have a spreadsheet for everything in life. Like last night, my son's graduating college in May, I started putting his calendar of events for his week of things that we need to do in my Excel spreadsheet. So I created this spreadsheet and it was helping me to understand what is this new job financially, what is the difference? And not just the salary, but the full compensation compensation package, was it better for me? And I'm going to speak to something at the end about that. And what we looked at is obviously what's in the salary, what comes out of your paycheck, that's on your paycheck, your 401k taxes, Medicare insurance, disability, flexible spending accounts, stock programs, life insurance, the list goes on and on and on. Those are the reoccurring things that always come out of your check. And then we looked at bonus, and not everybody gets a bonus, but when you get to the tier where you're bonus eligible, you also want to look at that. But one of the things I will caution you is live your life based on your salary, not your bonus potential. Because the thing that jobs will always tell you is this is a potential, and there are things and factors out of your control sometimes that can make that potential be non-existent. And so it's extremely important that you base all of your wellbeing based on your salary. And so you have what you're currently making and then what the new offer is. And one of the things that's important is especially if you may be switching states or cities, look at differences in city taxes, state taxes, those are critical, important. And then also look at your expenses. If you're moving locations, is the cost of living more or less than where you are. And so having all of that information upfront is important. And the reason I started here is because when you're sitting in someone's and you start the negotiations of salary, you need to know what are you negotiating for? So first and foremost, you need to know your value. What are you worth? Not what you make today, not what you want to make in the future, but what value do you bring to that organization and how are you going to take them to the next level?

Monique Parker:

The other thing that's important is researching the salary standards for your industry, for that region, for the role, because the EHS manager in North Carolina could be very different from a salary than an EHS manager in Texas. And if you're basing all of your information on a North Carolina EHS professional, when you're looking in Texas, those numbers may be different. So you could be over, you could be under, and either way, you're impacting your ability to be able to successfully negotiate. And then, like I mentioned, understand the full compensation package. And one of the questions that almost every headhunter, HR person, whomever, is looking at the job asks, what's your salary expectations?

Jill James:

Exactly. I love your answer to this.

Monique Parker:

And so the answer that I always give is, what is the range for the role? And therefore, a lot of times in some states now it's a requirement that they post that information and make it available. And sometimes it's not. But that's the answer that I never want to put myself in a situation where I'm on the upper end or the lower end. Ooh, if I had told them more, I could have got more. Or if I'm over their topping and they be like, oh, well, we can't afford them.

Jill James:

The other thing, Monique, that you said in answer to that question was, what have you budgeted for this position?

Monique Parker:

That

Jill James:

Was a good answer too. Yeah, say more about

Monique Parker:

That. And so looking at what you budgeted, when a company puts a rollout, obviously every company has a budget for the year, and that's what they're looking toward. And so there's already money allocated for that role if they're outside looking forward and interviewing and those types of things. So what is their budget is extremely important to understand, because if you go outside of that budget, then there may be some flexibility that you want to use in order to look at other compensation matters. So if their budget is on the top end of what you're expecting, then you can look at, well, how can I get more vacation? Or What are my stock options? Or the compensation availabilities are so much greater now than they used to be. Maybe it's, oh, well, I need to be remote for three days and more a hybrid working environment. But looking at ways to be flexible. If the number doesn't always meet what you're desiring based on the range or budget that they have, but you really like the job, you really like the location and you want to make it work, find a way to get your true value and other ways other than maybe the number that's on your paycheck.

Jill James:

And with your answer of what's been budgeted for this position, one of the other things you mentioned is if they share that with you and it's way low, why am I wasting my time here?

Monique Parker:

Another good point.

Jill James:

If there's no way to get up to the value that you're talking about, okay, so maybe it's not the money, but I can work from home for three days or all of those things. If it's so under, well, then it's time to walk away if you have the ability and flexibility to be able to do that.

Monique Parker:

Agreed. In the, I'll say in the last 18 months, there have been a lot of things going on in my world from a professional perspective, but at one time I was out in the market and looking, and I got a job offer, and they told me what the top range of the salary was, and then when they came to offer me the job, they offered me lower than the top range, although I had more qualifications than they desired. I brought to the table more experience than they were looking for. And I kept pushing and saying, this is, and even through the process, I explained to them, I'm willing to take a cut, but I need to be at your top end. I don't know how much more clear I could have been and that communication, but at the end of the day, I said no to the role because one, if they weren't willing to meet me where I was based on what they had already published, and after spending time with me understanding that I exceeded their expectations, then we were never going to be a good max or a fit. And so walking away is sometimes the best thing for you. It may be hard, especially if you're in a position where you don't have a job and you're looking for a job, but at the end of the day, once you devalue yourself, it's hard to get your value back to where you want it to be just because it starts playing a mental game with you.

Jill James:

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's talk more about total compensation package. You listed off a number of things, and many of them that are in your spreadsheet that we'll share with the audience, which is a starting point, and you can keep filling it in. So other things to think about with total compensation are like, are they paying for my cell phone? Do I have a company car? What are the deductibles for health insurance? What's the out-of-pocket max for this company versus that company? There's just so many things to think about that you can compare and line up where you are now with where you might want to go. What other things, when you think of total comp, do you think of?

Monique Parker:

Vacation is always one for me because I like to go a lot. The other one is 401k, what is the vesting timetable, and what is the match? If they both have comparable salaries and one gives you a match at 6% and one gives you a match at three or 4%, that may be a determining factor. And looking at how much value does that bring? Because at the end of the day, yes, your job today pays for your livelihood today, but you also have to realize that it's an investment for your retirement, so you need to make sure that you're looking at the long run and not just the short run. And a lot of these examples. And then we mentioned bonus, what is the bonus potential? And again, I remind you that that is always a potential. And there was something else that Lanaya had mentioned when we were together and it's slipping,

Jill James:

Right? When we were talking about bonuses specifically, the question that you would want to ask is, what is this tied to? Specifically ask that question, is this bonus tied to our company making a specific sales goal That you might not have any piece of but you're an influencer for? Or is it linked to some part of your performance? If we don't meet whatever stated goal it is for the year for the company, then is it a zero bonus or is it a percentage of that? And what is it? Being able to ask those questions specifically just puts you in a more knowledgeable position as you're making a consideration. And if your company has stock options, ask that out of the gate right away. Am I eligible for it? Can I get them? Yes, ask it right away. Easier to ask upfront than it is a year or two down the road.

Monique Parker:

Agreed. Completely.

Jill James:

Yeah. Yeah. So go ahead.

Monique Parker:

No, no, please finish.

Jill James:

I was just going to say, if anyone's listening to this and thinking, oh, man, this sounds really hard. I'm with you. I'm with you. The first time I asked for a raise was years, well, probably a decade at least into my career. And I had a Google, how do you ask for a raise? And here we are with Monique having a whole spreadsheet that's outlining total compensation. That just makes it so much, it's just so much easier, Monique, thank you for doing that, for putting it all in black and white. So it's not necessarily, oh, I have to figure out how to ask for a raise. You're really thinking about your value. What am I worth? What do I need? And it puts you in such a stronger position to be able to ask for those things. And I told the audience, when we were in Denver, my partner and life just accepted a new position, and while he was doing the salary negotiation piece, we took out Monique's spreadsheet and we used it in real time, and he was able to get tuition, student loan, student loan reimbursement, and moving expenses. We are thinking about total compensation, and he asked for it and he got it. And that's credit to Monique. So I think Mark actually owes you a gift. Monique,

Monique Parker:

I'm telling you this. And the spreadsheet is just the beginning. As Jill mentioned before, if we had made the spreadsheet inclusive of everything, it would be pages and pages. And so please use it and adapt it to best fit the needs that you have and look for all of those things. Relocation nowadays obviously is a big one in regards to what's part of that relocation. Do you buy houses or do you let me stay in my house until it sells? Those are big factors, especially if you're considering relocation,

Jill James:

Right? A hundred percent. A hundred percent. Alright, do we want to talk about the career map?

Monique Parker:

Yes. So obviously you all can't see the career map, but once you go into the resources, this is a tool that I learned about, probably about five, six years ago. And it was a game changer for me in regards to helping me understand, because me personally, I always look at jobs and titles. That's how I gauge am I advancing or doing better? And I had a very dear friend who reminded me that it's really about experiences. Experiences, get you the jobs and the titles. And so I started using this spreadsheet to help me understand the experiences I needed in order to go to the next level and understand what that looked like. And so you'll have a role, you have different certifications or education that are beneficial, that role, and then the skills that you either have obtained because this spreadsheet looks at where you were to where you want to go. And so you're outlining those points on where you were. And then on the end about where you want to go, it's going to identify, are there any certifications I need? Are there any skills that I need that I don't have? What is that role that I'm looking for? And then you can understand your strengths and your development needs so that you can put together an action plan on how you're going to gain experiences that you desire. And so after our session in NSC, I was speaking with a young lady and she was talking to me about what she wants to do and how she wants to get there. And I'm going to pause because I need to backtrack. During our session, there was also another lady who asked us, what if I'm just happy where I am?

Jill James:

What

Monique Parker:

If I have no desire to move up right now or take that next leap? And we applauded the fact knowing that you're okay, being where you are is just as important as knowing where you want to go, But being in the role you're in doesn't mean you do the day-to-day. You can still find opportunities to stretch and grow and expand your experiences being in that role. Volunteer to be on a project with a diverse team so you can learn from others. Look at opportunities to level up your skills, abilities and knowledge so that if you ever get ready to go up there, you don't have a gap in what you need in order to get to that next place. And so I use this career map to help me identify where are my opportunities for improvement, where are the experiences that I need? And then I use this to have conversations with my leaders so that they can help me figure out how I'm going to get to where I want to go. And another conversation I had with a young lady after our session is sometimes if you have those conversations and you don't have the support you need, it may be time for you to find another job. And that may be hard and harsh to hear that. At the same time, if your ambitions or your desires exceed the ability of where you're working, then you need to find the opportunity to find something or somebody that sees that potential and is willing to help you grow and develop and be the better version of who you are at that point.

Jill James:

Yeah. Monique, when you think about your superpowers when it comes to this career map and mapping your career, what would you say you are engaging or what are you leveraging superpower wise?

Monique Parker:

So for the spreadsheet queen over here, the one that I struggled with the most, which is why I needed this career map, was creativity. Being outside of the norm of what roles I could do or skills that I needed, I needed to be creative and figure out to gain those experiences outside of my bubble of EHS.

Jill James:

That's wonderful. Yeah, I looked at it, and when Monique is describing this career map in the resources, you'll be able, it's another thing that you can fill in. And so you can jump into any wherever you are in your career right now, and it's inviting you to march through your career thus far. Maybe you started as an intern and what certifications did you have there? What skills did you obtain there? And you keep moving forward and keep moving forward. And so when I look at the career map, the superpower that I think about is perseverance. I want to keep this thing up to date because it's a snapshot, but also it also really kind of forces you to take Zoom out and look at your career and go, oh, I did get that skill over here and over here, or maybe I need this other certification if I want to move into this kind of level of responsibility or this kind of job title. And so having the perseverance to keep it up to date is something that I think about. And for anyone who hasn't done a resume in a while, this is a really great jumping off point to get you thinking about where have you been, what did you learn, what did you gain so that you can actually work on a full resume.

Monique Parker:

I agree. And I just want to reiterate, because again, I'm preaching to the choir here on this one, figuring out the experiences became a lot more of a challenge or a landmark. For me, it was my place I wanted to get is I wanted to get experiences because earlier it was, I want to get that job title. I want to be this title before 30, this title before 40, and so on and so forth. And so now I look at, oh, I really want that experience because it's going to help me develop and be a much better leader regardless of what age I am or what title I have. And again, for those that like me, it was a healthy transition point from looking at title to experience.

Jill James:

Yeah, that's beautiful. Yeah. Beautiful. So as we were talking with people in Denver, we invited everyone at the beginning to self-identify what they thought their top superhero qualities or strengths were, and then we invited everyone again at the end to see, okay, so now that we've been talking for a while, is there something you're like, oh, yeah, I'm really good at that, or I know I'm a disruptor, but I didn't really think of it as a strength, but now I see, yes, I might have that, and yes, I can leverage that.

Monique Parker:

Yes.

Jill James:

In terms of growth, as we bring this to a close, and then let's share some more stories about things we heard from people. Let's talk about the importance of a board of directors. Monique, do you want to talk about your board?

Monique Parker:

I'd love to. So Jill did all the talking up front. Now I feel like I've got all the talking at the end. I'll help you out here. Thank you. Thank you. So the company that I worked for, there was a board of directors on our company, and he and I became friends and we just started having conversation. It was about, not necessarily about the company, but it was about my personal growth as a professional. And he asked me, he was like, do you have a board of directors? And I looked at him, he had three eyes in his head, and I was like, you're on our board of directors. He's like, no, not for the company. Do you have a personal board of directors? And I was like, I don't even know what that means. No, I don't. And so he explained to me that he had a group of men that were his board of directors, and they came from different walks of life, different industries, and they treated him like he was the company, and they were the board of directors of that company and helped guide him through transitional periods in his career. He started a business entrepreneur, started a business with his board of directors. And I mean, it was just impactful and a pivotal moment in his career in life. And he says they have board meetings where there's an agenda that these are the things we're going to talk about. And obviously he's the subject of all of them since he's the product. And it brought value if he was struggling with things, if he was looking to stretch himself or if he had done something stupid, his board of directors called him out. And I tell everybody, my board of directors are my biggest cheerleaders. They're my biggest advocates. They're my biggest critics. They will tell me I'm great, and they'll tell me I was wrong and all the things in between. And that's what a board of director should be when you have a personal board of directors, is you need the truth tellers. You need people who are not going to sugar coat anything. They're going to tell you when you're right. They're going to tell you when you're wrong. And the other piece that I used when I developed my board was what areas professionally were I lacking? So for me, I did not understand tax finance was a weak area for me. So in my first group of board of directors, I had a tax professional who was one of my personal board members, and she helped me understand a lot of different things from a financial perspective in a company setting, but also personally. And so that is how I look at my personal board of directors. Now, they are people that will, I can call it the drop of a hat that will, like I said, they'll be brutally honest with me regardless of if it's good or bad. And they only have my best interest in mind. And so I am a super big advocate of people having a personal board of directors. And it's not just, oh, these are my friends. Yes, they will be your friends, but you need to pick people that will be honest with you.

Jill James:

That's right. That's right. Yeah. And so it can be formal like Monique is talking about. It can be informal. I also have a personal board of directors, Monique, thank you for being one of those people that I can tap and say, Hey, I'm faced with this really tough decision at work right now. This is really hard. I have to do this thing. I have to execute on this thing. I need some guidance here. Have you done this before? So you can have, yes, the formality of getting everyone together, but you can also go to individuals in a moment and say, something's happening and I need to engage and I need your help. Which is a really great opportunity when you have personal board of directors who aren't within your company. And when you're, that whole thing that we started out with, it's lonely at the top because sometimes you're asked to do things that not very many people in an organization can talk about. There's confidentiality issues. That's when you can reach to someone else outside the organization and say, Hey, I need a conversation here. I need a little bit of help. My partner and I engaged a personal board of directors. I mentioned that he was just negotiating for a new job, and that includes he and I making a geographic change. So we're picking up and moving our lives in the month that we're recording this. And we tapped two people that we both know who are retired wise, people retired from their corporate world, and we said, could we please have a board of directors meeting with you? And they're like, okay. So we showed up at their house and they gave us dinner, but I said, Hey, listen, we have an objective and there's some agenda items tonight. And they're like, all right. And we talked about those agenda items and about picking up a life after you've lived somewhere a really long time changing communities. And they shared their wisdom and asked us some really hard questions. And in the end, their wisdom came out in a brief way. They said, as long as you have people place and purpose, everything's going to work out. And so then they engaged us with, think about those three things. Do each of you have those three things where you're going, or could you have them? Which one is most important to you? And that was just beautiful.

Monique Parker:

Yeah, I love that. I love that because sometimes it's what sound like simple questions we don't ask ourselves, but when you really have someone who has your vested interests, they will definitely help you look at the big picture in the holistic view. So I'm so happy that you had that experience.

Jill James:

Yeah, it was so good. Yeah. I guess the other, I want to make sure that you and I, and with Lanaya and Christie, we talk about this each time. We have an opportunity to be in front of an audience of women and allies. And that's to remember to look around at the leadership table that you're at and ask who's missing, who's missing? Who needs space to be here? Who is a voice, a talent that needs to be here? Just because you got there doesn't mean there's only room for one of you.

Monique Parker:

True.

Jill James:

Yeah. Yeah. So look around who's missing, who can be invited in, and how can you be instrumental in making that happen for someone else?

Monique Parker:

Yes. That is our challenge for you.

Jill James:

It is. It absolutely. Hey, I have to tell one story and tell me, and then just share if you have any other stories. After we got done in Denver, I don't know, maybe a week later, I got a phone call from a professional EHS friend of mine who was at the conference with his team. And he said, Hey, Jill, remember how I told two of my female employees to come to your session? I'm like, yeah. And he said, well, one of 'em I offered a promotion to. And then I just started laughing into the phone. And he goes, yeah, you know what happened? And I said, you made her an offer and she challenged you, didn't she counter offered, didn't she? And he goes, yes. And it's all because of that presentation that she went to. And I said, well, how'd she do? He said, she got more money and a bigger bonus.

Monique Parker:

That is a win for the day.

Jill James:

It was so awesome. And he was grateful. He said it was awesome. She put to use what she learned, and we were happy to do that for her. And we were laughing about it. And also, wow, what a great outcome.

Monique Parker:

We all go to these conferences, we give presentations, we sit in presentations hoping for that nugget of, oh, that aha moment that we come away with and we can do something with. And so as a presenter, when you hear those stories, it feels like, okay, I can continue. That was good. And there was a positive outcome because sometimes in our profession, there are so many things that can take us down a very different path. And so I think it's important that when we do have the opportunity to be that light to help somebody else, that we do it. I very similarly had a conversation before I even left Denver with a young lady, and we were talking about her career and how she was feeling, and later on she sent me a message and she said, I advocated for myself because one of the questions I asked her, I said, who do you advocate for? And she was listing all these people and things that she advocated for.

Monique Parker:

I said, well, what makes them better than you? Because so many times we are happy to be an advocate for others, and we just think that somebody else is doing it for ourselves. What I've learned in my 20 plus years is that if we think somebody else is doing it, then probably nobody is advocating for us. So you have to always be your biggest advocate. And sometimes that may be looked at, depending on the company you're with, your manager at the time. Some people may be threatened or uncomfortable with that, but that's not your problem. Because at the end of the day, the greatness that we all house within us is deserved to be shared. And if others can't see it, then sometimes we have to help them see it. And sometimes that means advocating for ourselves.

Jill James:

That's right. That's beautiful. I love that. I love that. Were there other stories you wanted to share?

Monique Parker:

I mean, we've talked with so many people since that session. Yes, we have. And it's only been a month, and it is great, and it's amazing. And every time I just think about, man, I've been where they are. And one other young lady came to me and she was telling me this story, and it broke my heart

Jill James:

To

Monique Parker:

Tell her. I said, I'm sorry, but you have to leave. I mean, her side of the story, there was no way around it from a standpoint of personal support, professional support, being able to feel like she was making a difference, personal confirmation of what they were doing. I felt defeated for her just when the simple fact of the results that she was seeing, the way people were talking to her. And so I definitely want to tell you that sometimes in our sessions, we may energize you in a way that is going to be different than what you anticipate. But sometimes leaving or saying no or not taking the job offer or going a different path may seem really challenging at the time, but I feel very confident that as long as you're doing things for yourself personally, that are going to personally invest in yourself, even a no or a not at this time can be better than being in a situation that is unhealthy for you physically, mentally, emotionally, whatever case it may be.

Jill James:

Yeah, right. I feel like our sessions often are retrospectives. We have the opportunity at these conferences to really think about where am I in my career in this job? We are always helping others, looking out for others, safeguarding the health and wellbeing of others. And the conferences sometimes are the opportunity to ask, what am I doing for me? And sometimes it's like, I got to get out of here. And sometimes it's like, it's really good where I'm at, where I want to grow, where I want to grow. Yeah,

Monique Parker:

Exactly.

Jill James:

I mentioned earlier that the resources to the presentation, the handouts that Monique's been talking about, and some additional resources will be on a dedicated webpage that you'll find in the show notes of the podcast. Monique, you also mentioned earlier people can reach out to on LinkedIn. Same for me, same for me. So anyone can reach out to us. Yeah.

Monique Parker:

Yes, most definitely. I love to have these types of conversations and sometimes, and I ask everybody, what do you want from me? Do you want me to listen? Do you want me to give you my experiences? What is your desire? Because sometimes it's not that you need me to say anything, you just need to get things off your chest or you need confirmation that what you're doing is right. That was another conversation I had. A young lady explained all the things she was doing, and I said, so what do you need from me? And I didn't mean it in a negative way, but it was, it was my way of confirming that all the things she was doing were right on track with what I would do. And so I know Jill and I, and Lanaya and Christie are all happy to support you all in any way we can and have those conversations or be a listening ear or help you find the right resources.

Jill James:

That's right. That's right. Well, Monique, thank you for coming on the podcast. Thank you for doing this with me. Lanaya, we missed having you here, Christie, we missed having you here, but thanks for making the time today for the listeners of the podcast. Monique, I appreciate it.

Monique Parker:

It was my pleasure. I always enjoy sharing from our experiences and just feeding off each other through our stories and our experiences.

Jill James:

Yeah. And thank you all for spending your time listening today, and more importantly, thank you for your contribution toward the common good me, your employees, and those we influence. Know that our profession cares deeply about human wellbeing, which is the core of our practice. If you aren't subscribed and want to hear past and future episodes, you can subscribe in iTunes, the Apple Podcast app, or any other podcast player you'd like. Or if you prefer to read, you can read a transcript and listen@hsi.com. We'd love it if you could leave a rating and review us on iTunes. It really helps us connect the show with more and more EHS professionals like Monique and I. Special thanks to Emily Gould, our podcast producer, and until next time, thanks for listening.